24 Hours of LeMons
john posted in rides on July 24th, 2006
Put it down to an occasional Jawfish foray into the topical. Send it to the Things-That-Ought-to-Be Department.
Maybe it’s a hoax but who cares?
Announcing the 24 Hours of LeMons race for cars worth less than $500, plus safety equipment.
The crowd. The spectacle. The pall of blue smoke and roasted clutch discs. In all motorsport, no event captures the universal human need to whale on old crapcans and hoover down greasy barbecue like the 24 Hours of LeMons.
This endurance race is for cars purchased, fixed up, and track-prepped for a total of 500 bucks or less–and before reaching the grid, you’ll have to survive the Old-Lady Mannequin Slalom, the Oil-Slicked Baby Carriage Braking Test, the Brick On the Gas Pedal Challenge, and similar qualifying rounds. The racing on Saturday and Sunday is broken up by an all-night party—don’t miss the masseuses, hot tubbing, gold-toothed rappers, barbecued roadkill, drive-in car movies, exceedingly caffeinated beverages, Ferris wheel, and other wholesome diversions. Twelve hours into the race, the car voted People’s Choice (for best concept and prep) is called in and awarded a cash prize. Simultaneously, the car voted People’s Curse (for being driven by the biggest jerk-offs) is called in and summarily crushed. At the end of 24 hours, a gala awards ceremony plies the survivors with trophies, plaques, and four-figure purses paid with canvas bags full of nickels.
Contact:
SOCIETE d’ JUNQUEHEAPS du MONS
(aka DriversDoor, Inc.)
Jay Lamm, l’Gran Fruite
5675 Horton Street, Suite C
Emeryville CA 94608
510.507.5778
510.547.8479 fax
jlamm@driversdoor.com
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